Autism, Identity, and Intersectionality: A Guide for Autistic Adults

Summary

After discovering you are autistic, you will likely begin to ask deep questions about who you really are. For many autistic adults, this realisation marks the beginning of reconnecting with their true self – sometimes for the first time.

This autistic-designed guide explores identity, language, and intersectionality, which recognises that our experiences of being autistic are shaped by other parts of who we are. You will also hear personal reflections and find additional resources created by others within the autistic community.

Whether you are formally diagnosed or self-identified autistic, your identity is valid, You belong here.

2. Realising You Are Autistic Can Change How You See Yourself

After learning that you are autistic, it is common to start asking questions about your identity. Many people reflect on their life and wonder, “Who am I, really?”

This can be the start of a processing of reconnecting with your authentic self – the version of you that existed before you were taught to mask and change parts of yourself to fit into the world around you.

The process of unmasking your autism might bring up feelings of grief, confusion, curiosity, or even joy. All of those feelings are valid.

You don’t need to have all the answers straight away.

3. There Is No One Way To Be Autistic

Autistic people are as varied and unique as any other group of people. We have different personalities, preferences, life experiences, communication styles, and ways of moving through the world.

You do not need to be like other autistic people to be valid. If you hear someone describe their experience and it feels different to your own, that is okay. You still belong in autistic spaces.

4. Language and Identity: Choosing Words That Feel Right To You

Language matters – and it is okay if you are still figuring out what feels right for you.

Many people in the autistic community prefer identity-first language, such as “autistic person,” because being autistic is not separate from who they are. It is not something they have – it is something they are.

Others may choose person-first language, such as “person with autism,” especially if that feels right for them personally or in certain settings.

There is no single “correct” way to talk about being autistic. You are allowed to use whatever language feels most comfortable to you.

It’s also okay if the language you prefer changes over time.

5. What is Intersectionality?

Examples of intersectionality:

• • Autistic and ADHD
  • Autistic and Black
  • Autistic and a woman
  • Autistic and part of the LGBTQ+ community
  • Autistic and working class

All of these parts of you shape how you are treated by others, how you see yourself, and what barriers you might face.

Your intersectionality can also help you find deep connection with people who share your experiences.

6. You Don’t Have To Navigate This Alone

Some people begin to reconnect with their identity by:

• • Joining autistic-led spaces online or in person
  • Listening to other autistic people share their stories
  • Finding people who share their intersectional identity

This is why is it so important to find spaces where you can truly feel at home. It can take time, but those spaces are out there.

7. Building A Positive Autistic Identity

Reflecting on your identity can bring up memories and feelings from the past. You might start to see your life differently now that you understand yourself through an autistic lens.

This journey might involve:

• • Relearning who you are
  • Letting go of the pressure to mask or perform
  • Practicing self-compassion
  • Meeting others who share your experiences

Some people describe this as finally feeling “normal” in a room, often for the first time.

There is something powerful about being around others who get it – who do not need you to explain or justify yourself.

8. Embracing Your Autism

Being autistic might come with challenges, but it is also deeply connected to who we are, how we experience the world, and what we bring to it.

9. Further Resources and Support

10. Watch the Embrace Autism Video: Identity and Intersetionality

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